[Mark Schlabach covers college football and men's college basketball for ESPN.com and he created the "Hate list" below. You can contact him at schlabachma@yahoo.com.]
Michigan hates Ohio State because the Buckeyes added four more Ls to Lloyd Carr’s first name. The Buckeyes hate Michigan because Carr no longer coaches there.
Florida hates Georgia because the Bulldogs last season danced in the end zone — and because Urban Meyer didn’t think of doing it first. The Bulldogs hate Florida because Tim Tebow dances with stars.
Alabama hates Tennessee because Phillip Fulmer became a sleuth. The Volunteers hate Alabama because the Crimson Tide finally have someone who can coach.
Notre Dame hates Navy because it can’t even beat the Midshipmen anymore. Navy hates that it doesn’t have coach Paul Johnson anymore.
Florida State’s Bobby Bowden hates that Penn State’s Joe Paterno won’t just quit. Fans of both schools hate that neither one of them has quit.
West Virginia hates Michigan because Rich Rodriguez coaches there. Pittsburgh hates West Virginia because Rodriguez still isn’t there.
Texas hates Oklahoma because the Sooners beat the Longhorns with players from Texas. Oklahoma hates Texas because the Horns win their bowl games.
The ACC hates that it hasn’t become the SEC. The SEC hates that it leads the country in parolees.
LSU hates that it opens the season against Appalachian State. The Mountaineers hate that they don’t get to play Michigan again.
USC hates UCLA because the Bruins hired a cheater. UCLA hates USC because the Trojans still haven’t been caught cheating.
LSU hates Alabama because Nick Saban referred to a Tiger fan in not the nicest of terms. Alabama hates Mike Shula because the team Saban inherited can’t beat anyone’s butts.
Notre Dame hates Illinois because Ron Zook outworks the Irish in recruiting. The Illini hate Iowa because the Hawkeyes still outcoach them.
Louisville hates Arkansas because Bobby Petrino coaches there. The Cardinals hate Petrino because he left them his players.
Stanford hates that it upset USC but couldn’t even beat Notre Dame. The Fighting Irish hate that each of Charlie Weis’ victories cost more than $1 million.
Kansas hates Missouri because the Tigers beat it. Missouri hates the Jayhawks because it really didn’t matter when the BCS invitations were delivered.
Alabama hates Auburn because Tommy Tuberville has two thumbs. The Tigers hate South Florida because the Bulls turned them into bums.
Tennessee hates Duke because the Blue Devils stole its best coach. Clemson hates Arkansas because the Razorbacks didn’t hire its coach.
Miami hates Virginia for running up the score. The Cavaliers hate Wyoming because the Cowboys barely let them score.
Steve Spurrier hates that he can’t teach South Carolina how to win a title. Georgia fans hate that Spurrier didn’t forget how to beat them.
But one thing we all love is that College Football is Back! Let’s get it on!
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Please pray for my two brothers. They are firemen in Baton Rouge and are working 36 hours on and 12 hours off getting prepared for Hurricane Gustav.
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Jason Robertson is a husband and a father and a pastor. He is dedicated to leading and equipping his the Church with God’s word and biblical theology for life ministry, using a combination of pastoral, church planting and evangelism experience. He holds a Master of Divinity from New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. He is experienced in church planting, evangelism, missions, and the training of pastors and Bible teachers.
Jason has been preaching the gospel since 1985, serving the first ten years of ministry as a Southern Baptist itinerant evangelist out of Milldale Baptist Church in Zachary, LA which ordained him in 1993. He has preached in hundreds of churches in over 30 States and 4 countries. He planted churches in Siberia, Russia in the summers of 1993 and 1994. He founded Murrieta Valley Church in California, which he planted in cooperation with the SBC NAMB in 2001. He also teaches ministry students at California Baptist University.
You can hear his sermons and read his manuscripts on sermonaudio.com. Just follow the link to "sermons" at the top of this page.
Everyone should hate Alabama!
I don’t mind ‘Bama, but doesn’t everybody hate Miami (the one in Florida, not Ohio)?
The one about Bowden and Paterno is soooo true.
Please pray for my brother and his son in Slidell, LA.
My parents place got hit hard; they suffered structural damage. Thankfully no one was hurt. They live near Baton Rouge.
Actually, we Sooners hate saxeT b/c Texas sucks.
Texas statement…true. Would add that Texas also hates players who leave for Oklahoma, not just Oklahoma.